Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Shut Up, Molly!!

I hate pets!

I just wanted to get that out there.

Stop cursing at me.

I am not evil.

In my mind, I do love animals. Well, most animals. Most animals who do not live with me. And I don't like cats - at all. Sorry cat lovers! A pet, to me, is pretty much like having another offspring around to feed, make messes and stink up the house.

So, then, why do you have this beast you ask? Because, my lovely hubby, just brought her home one day. Yup, you heard me! He just came home, from work, in the middle of the day, with this smelly, messy beast. No he wasn't on his lunch break. No he wasn't working close to home - he was about 45 minutes away. No it did not occur to him, in those 45 minutes, to pick up his cell phone and call his wonderful wife and "discuss" this important family decision. Nope. He decided to use the shock tactic.

Me and the kiddos were hanging at the house when suddenly, hubby opens up the back door. I was a bit perplexed. We don't use the back door unless we're in the back yard. Now, he's standing there, kind of outside the door while its open with a slight smirk on his face. And before you know it, the beast walks in. Oh yes, hubby is still smirking. I ask him what he's thinking. He says she's free. I say take it back and the kiddos scream noooo. Then he proceeds to give me all the facts about her because that will make me want to let the beast stay. After listening to him blab and listening to the kiddos swoon over said beast, I gave the Mom speech....everyone has to help take care of the beast and if you don't she'll be gone and if she can't do her business outside she's gone. OK Mommy, we'll help Mommy, we LOVE YOU Mommy! I told you I wasn't evil!

Hubby got soooooooo lucky (not in that way)! The beast never had accidents in the house ever and so she's still here......4 years later.....against my will.

Neurotically Yours!


Ann(ie) said...

I gotta say....I'm with you. I don't have a dog. Part of me wants a dog, but they're messy and slobbery and messy and slobbery. But, they are much nicer than my bipolar feline so maybe I should rethink this!!?

The Mom said...

Thanks for stopping by my place, I LOVE your blog, your Valtrex post was hilarious, our hubbies sound very similar!!